By Felicity Lenehan
As mums of ‘the sandwich generation’, we often find ourselves juggling a hundred different responsibilities, including, with the projected doubling of Australians aged 85 and over by 2042, our ageing parents. But in the midst of the juggle, do our elderly loved ones get forgotten? The strong increase in the rise of life story telling would say no. It seems now more than ever we are striving for true connection with our much-loved parents, as we pay the respect of listening and recording their stories.
A life story is more than just documenting dates and events; it’s about capturing the essence of a person—their wisdom, experiences, laughter, and even the lessons they learned along the way. Did they wear shoes to school? (Often they did not!) What was their first date like, and how did it compare with yours? Preserving a parent’s life story is a meaningful way to honour their journey, strengthen your relationship, and ensure their story lives on for your children.
Our parents and grandparents have seen life through an entirely different lens. Whether they grew up in post-war Australia, immigrated with only a suitcase, or lived through social changes that shaped the world we now know, their experiences are invaluable. These stories offer future generations insight into their background, providing a sense of connection and belonging.
Making memories while capturing a life story
One of the most beautiful aspects of preserving a life story is the journey you take with your loved one while doing so. Sitting down with your parent or grandparent to reminisce can be a joyful experience. And, as is often the case, a rather “enlightening” experience too!
You may discover similarities in the way you parent, details you never knew about their childhood, or challenges they faced as young adults. For grandchildren, being part of this process can be equally rewarding. Imagine a child sitting with their grandparent, hearing first-hand about their childhood mischief or adventures. Don’t give them any ideas grandad! This deepens their connection and instils a greater respect for their older family members. These moments create new memories while preserving the old.
The challenge: Getting started
While many people want to write a life story, getting started and staying on track can be daunting. With membership at Australian’s national organisation of life story tellers having increased by 50 per cent in the past two years, there is much help available. Costs vary wildly, but there are options for everyone, and a skilled writer has a way with words which will have you hearing your loved one’s voice when you read their stories back in years to come. These writers will organise a whole life’s-worth of information into an order that is easy to read – no mean feat if you have a Dad who’s got 80 years-worth of stories!
There are now affordable life story options available, mostly the making of big tech companies who’ve seen a gap in the market. It’s worth noting that while some big tech platforms offer automated life story services, many people, particularly those who have not grown up with the internet, struggle to complete them without real human interaction. Studies have shown that a high percentage of individuals abandon self-service life story platforms before finishing because they are just not writers. And, with a loneliness epidemic affected particularly the older generation, it’s another activity they will do alone. New to the market is a platform which is full of functions that encourage loved ones to come together to record the life stories, such as voice-to-text and inbuilt responsive questions developed by life story writers who know the craft intimately. This brings hope that technology can help foster human connection, rather than simply frustration!
Why put off till tomorrow what you can do today?
One of the biggest regrets families have is waiting too long to record a loved one’s life story. Health declines, memory fades, and sometimes, life takes unexpected turns. The saddest words often heard from families when collated a Eulogy are, “I wish we had done this sooner.”
If you’ve been thinking about preserving your parent’s life story, now is the time. Don’t wait for the “perfect” moment—it may never come. Instead, start small. Have a conversation, record a few memories, and build from there. Every story captured is a piece of history saved.
How to get started
- Start the Conversation – Approach your parent or grandparent and express your interest in preserving their life story. Reassure them that it’s not about writing a perfect book but about capturing their memories for future generations.
- Use Prompts – Sometimes, people don’t know where to start. Simple questions like “What was your childhood home like?” or “What’s the best advice you ever received?” can open the floodgates of memory.
- Record the Stories – Whether you take handwritten notes, record audio, or film your conversations, make sure their words are documented in some form.
- Get Professional Help – If you’re feeling overwhelmed, consider working with a professional life story writer who has a way with words and can turn scattered memories into a beautifully written narrative.
- Preserve It – Once complete, print a book, create an audio memoir, or even a digital archive. Share it with family members so that these treasured stories are never lost.
Whether you choose to write a life story yourself or get help writing a life story from a professional, the most important thing is to start. Don’t leave it too late—your family’s history is worth preserving.
Give your parent or grandparent the gift of a lifetime by capturing their story. It’s a gift that will be treasured long after they’re gone—a true testament to their journey and the love they shared.
Authors Bio
Felicity Lenehan has been a life story writer for over a decade and is passionate about the benefits recording a life story brings – from deeper connection, to using narrative therapy for healing, in the benefits of recording stories for posterity, and just for the sheer enjoyment of the activity. She is the founder of the My Story Mentor Program, a life story creation platform which makes the process of recording a life story easy, quick, affordable and accessible for all, so that everyone can experience these benefits with their loved ones.
Check out their website: https://awaywithwords.net